Lockdown musings, 5 months in…

It’s been 152 days since we moved into our ‘new’ house, 149 days since the UK went into official lockdown and 46 days since my last blog post (a record in 8 years of Gingey Bites). I just know that if I don’t sit down and type something today, I’m not sure I ever will again. And that seems like a shame because I enjoy the blog and I know that despite my silence, you are still coming to have a look and read it – thank you for that!

Mental heath and lockdown musings     

I guess the thing is, at the start of lockdown, we’d just bought our first house and were super excited to finally be here, with our big garden and plans for how we would personalise the space. Filled with enthusiasm and spare cash we were raring to go. And then lockdown. All DIY plans on hold, shops closed, working from home. Then, in April, after being furloughed, Dave lost his job. The company folded, less than 6 months after he joined and less than a year since we were both made redundant from our previous company. Also, it was on the same day his granddad died. Not great timing eh? But then we re-homed three battery rescue chickens. Swings and roundabouts.

Working from home for me has been tough – and I know how lucky we are, I do. We’re healthy, our families are healthy and we have our spacious home and garden but it’s been tough. At first, I was cooking all sorts, using the extra time to experiment in the kitchen and generally cook more. During this time the blog was on fire.

Then it all went tits-up. June was a disaster and I ended up putting the podcast on pause. There was too much stress and I’d turned it into a task, not something I enjoyed anymore. I’d lost my podcast partner back in January and managed to continue alone but it’s a time-consuming hobby, with editing taking 3-4 hours per episode, the marketing, the blog posts, organising the interviews, recording the interviews etc., too much. So I hit the brakes. And now, it’s in hiatus, until I decide what to do. There are loads of episodes available though, so if you fancy a listen, they’re all still there. I’m back on my anti-depressants, which I took for several years but came off last year, and I’m having CBT to deal with anxiety and to try and curb the excessive amount of worrying I like to do. Right now, things are improving. Better and more focused.

In July, we got engaged and had our one and only trip to anywhere remotely exciting – we went to The Ethicurean for a picnic and it was so so perfect. I had no idea Dave was planning to propose, it was a complete surprise!!! The food was excellent, the atmosphere was magical and we literally didn’t speak to another person. Bliss. We’ve also been trying to support indies as much as possible with a weekly takeaway and have had some incredible food from Bristol legends like The Cauldron, Tsukemono, Hoba Kebab, Omar’s Kitchen and For Mice and Men, Oowee burger and more…

We also adopted Jiji and Kuro, our new kittens. They’re so so cute it actually hurts, and met lockdown baby niece Eve, once Wales had opened the doors. She’s two month’s old now and absolutely gorgeous. It as a pretty good month in hindsight, not sure why I’m moaning!! But hey, these are my lockdown musings so I’ll write what I want!

Now? We’re on month 5 (I think). We’re yet to have an overnight guest, or really any real house guests to our new home. None of my family has visited from the Midlands and so far, Dave’s parents and a couple of local friends have been banished to the garden on the few occasions they’ve been round. I’m still working from home which I hate (though lucky to have a decent day job), Dave is still looking for work, and it’s fucking hot. So I’m miserable today! And moaning to you lucky folks. The meal plans are getting less and less interesting and I’ve developed an obsession with Top Chef. But, we have kittens, and more chickens, and that’s a lot of fun.

In summary

I think what I’m trying to say is that like many people out there, life is pretty much dotted with highs but mostly middle/lows. The highs have been amazing but over the course of 5 months, they’ve been few and far between. My family has grown from the two to nine; us, two kittens and five chickens (we bought two more fancy chickens, more on them another time). And we’re growing loads of veggies and have done so much in the garden. But, it’s hard to keep motivated with no real end in sight.

I don’t trust other people yet enough to go to the pub, to go to a restaurant or any large busy spaces so we’re pretty much in the same zone as we were in May/June – seeing a few friends in gardens and spending all our free time in the garden or in front of the TV, occasionally with a takeaway from one of our favourite indies and yes, sometimes Papa John’s.  It’ll be a while yet before I’m out and about like so many of you seem to be.

Moving on

I’ve been told I’ll be working from home until at latest January and it sounds as though the country is poised to head back into lockdown. Dave continues his job hunt and it seems as though the market is opening up so there’s hope ahead, as long as the recession doesn’t hit his industry too hard.

It feels like we’re starting to find our groove, from two very social beings who were out a lot, to stay-at-home cat and chicken parents. We miss our friends and family (especially mine up in the Midlands) but things are starting to feel normal, like this is the new way of the world, you know?

I would love to hear what you guys enjoy reading most on the blog – is it the recipes, the cooking the books challenge, travel stuff (that one’s a bit tricky right now!) or something else? Perhaps chickens and gardening? Let me know in the comments below and I will get cracking on some new and happier posts. Time to get this baby back up and running! I’d also like to hear how you’ve been getting on with lockdown. Have you loved it? Hated it? Had an easy time or a really hard time? 

To be honest I don’t quite know what this stream of lockdown musings was for, other than to get my words out of my head and onto a page. But I’ve come to the end of a long ramble very selfishly focused on my own experience over the last few months and it feels pretty good. So that’s something!

If I was to write a follow up, I fear it’d get too dark for what should be a light hearted food blog. I’d rant about politics and the government’s appalling response to the pandemic, the state of this country right now, Brexit, Lebanon, the importance of the Black Lives Matter movement and all the things outside of this house that are fucked with the world. Wow, 2020, you really did a number on us eh?

For now though, watch this space…